I don't. But don't get me wrong. I'd much rather be living my life than spending everyday writing about it.
Then I feel guilty that I should be consistently updating the blog and keeping it current for the girls but if I do that it takes time away from actually doing the thing I'd be writing about. Then I get writer's block and frustrated. And like now, 2weeks have passed and I haven't even looked at the blog.
I also get a little overwhelmed because so much has happened in these 2 weeks that if I took the time to write out each thing in detail it would take me too long so this post is going to be a short synopsis of the highlights.
First there's the cat. Or rather lack of.
Nanner's, our beautiful kitty, began peeing in the house awhile ago. I had actually thought it was Ava when she was being potty trained but now that we've added up all the occurrences all signs point to Nanner's and this had been occurring since before we brought home Sugar. Then I thought the dogs were pooping in strange places in the house although the piles looked too big to be Sugar and too small to be Lady. Nanner's started out slowly but by about two weeks ago she was pooping in the house almost everyday and peeing on the furniture. Dave and I had to make a tough decision since she was not an outdoors cat and that wasn't an option that we had to give her up.
We drove her to the shelter and kissed her goodbye. We cried the whole way home. It was very awful as I never thought she wouldn't be with us unless she was old and sick and had to be put to sleep. She was at the shelter in a small cage for a few days and then her picture appeared on their website for 3 days and then it was gone. We thought she had been adopted but Dave called to check up on her and they said another non-kill shelter had come to get her because they were going to put her to sleep. Dave called the new shelter and they said was doing well and up for adoption and today she is listed on their website. She is in a big room with a bed and a kitty condo and she has a lot of room to walk around. Everyday I think that I should go get her but I know that things will not work out with her and our furniture.
The girls miss her terribly. They ask when we can go get her. I look at their sad little faces and tell them we can't. The worst was when Ava was walking into our closet where Nanner's slept all day and she thought she saw her and Ava's face lit up and she screamed, "Mommy, Nanners... Oh. I thought Nanners was in here." And then her face turned into a grimace and she walked away. It feels like we've had a death in the family. I hope someone adopts Nan and loves her as much as we do.
Second, my friend (without giving the details to protect her privacy) had a breakdown and was taken to the mental hospital. She was locked up for 5 days over Easter. She's a really great person. Someone who tries to literally take care of everyone. I can't imagine what that was like for her although she told me she was afraid for her life in there. Now that she is out, she is going to therapy and taking medication, but she has begun secluding herself away from everyone. It's really sad. I want to help her but I can't. I talk with her husband once a week. He says that she is hardly leaving the house. She feels too anxious. I get that. I get that therapy and recovery is a process- a long process. But at the same time I selfishly feel like I am losing my friend. I fear she will hide away from me out of shame or something. And that totally sucks because everyone at some point in their life falls apart. She is my friend. She will always be my friend even if we don't speak again for the next 10 years. I just want her to be OK. To feel happy. To have her life back. I miss her.
Third, Dave and I went to New Orleans for Jazz Fest and to visit his family. His nephew went through first communion as well and Dave is his Godfather so it was important for him to be there. The concert was awesome as usual. We had a huge shrimp dinner before the oil spill could taint the rest of the gulf shrimp. After the communion we had a family get together. Dave's Mom and sister came. We had a crawfish boil and partied with some friends. The trip was short. The girls stayed at home with my mom and dad. They had their first ballet class that weekend so my parent took them. I was sad to miss "a first" ballet class for the girls. I think this was actually their first anything that I didn't get to witness. But my parent took good care of them. They shuffled Olivia to and from school, took them to church, out to dinner, to HD for the Saturday project... They were doted on and that's the point while Dave and I got to enjoy a vacation without having to worry about them and we just got to enjoy each other's company. Flying is so much easier without kids. I had forgotten that. I called the girls every morning when they got up and every night when they went to bed. Dave said their prayers with them and listened to their stories. My dad also built each one of them a cradle and brought it with him so he took the girls to the paint store and they picked out their own paint and painted their own cradle. They were very busy and very very happy.
Fourth, Swimming, allergies, and ballet. The second swim session began the Monday we got back. The girls and I had been taking our allergy medication but that Monday was very windy and we all started sneezing. Last week was so difficult for me to be outside. My eyes were watery, I could hardly breath, but Liv had school and they had swimming so I managed to drag my carcass around and schlep them back and forth. Thursday I was at my worst and thankfully so was Olivia so she stayed home from school and slept until 9:30 AM. The rest of the day we sat around sneezing until swimming. They felt better after practice since the chlorine helps dry them up. Me, on the other hand, felt worse. A lot worse. I could hardly drive home with my eyes dripping, my nose dripping, constantly sneezing, the works. But we made it and we felt better by Saturday to go to ballet. There's only 2 more ballet classes and then it ends and this is the last week of swimming as well. Right now it is storming outside so I don't know if we'll go today. I guess it is good we went to the park earlier to jog a few laps and play soccer. We left because it started to sprinkle but by the time we got home it stopped so the girls rode their bikes. At least we got some exercise today. The girls have officially been signed up for Soccer and Hip Hop for June, July, and August which they are looking forward to since they will both be out of school. I feel like I'm making progress with keeping Ava active and on a low calorie diet. Things are looking good for her.
Lastly, Mother's Day. On Mother's day I actually had a post running around in my head about how what mother's day means to me and about how much I love my kids and how grateful I am for them to be mine. But on my day I was allergy ridden and not about to sit and type anything. Now I'm feeling much better, I got the good meds from the doctor, and am ready to share what Mother's day means to me.
I love my Mother. Without her there'd be no me. Any without me there wouldn't be my crazy kids. So Mother's Day to me means I am thankful for everything my mom has done for me, for everything she didn't do for me, for who she is as a person and who is isn't, for knowing how to raise me to be a good person and leading the way to be a good mom. I guess when I had kids I thought Mother's Day would always be about me. Really it's all about my mom. I couldn't imagine my life without her. I hope to do nearly as good of a job for my girls as she has done for me.
The day was great despite my allergies. Dave took the girls to get my meds which by noon made me a breathing person again. He also did a build/paint project in the garage with the girls. They built two different plant holders and a butterfly box that attracts butterflies if all goes well. Then they painted them. It made me feel good they had fun with their dad while I took pictures of them. Then they napped and Dave and I watched a movie. Later they made me breakfast in bed for dinner and they all played bowling on the Wii. Before bed, Liv came and snuggled me and told me a story about three little pigs while we laid under the covers. That was a perfect day. I couldn't have asked for more.
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